The Chronicles of Narnia - The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (Full Screen Edition)

Amazon.com

C.S. Lewis's classic novel The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe makes an ambitious and long-awaited leap to the screen in this modern adaptation. It's a CGI-created world laden with all the special effects and visual wizardry modern filmmaking technology can conjure, which is fine so long as the film stays true to the story that Lewis wrote. And while this film is not a literal translation--it really wants to be so much more than just a kids' movie--for the most part it is faithful enough to the story, and whatever faults it has are happily faults of overreaching, and not of holding back. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe tells the story of the four Pevensie children, Lucy, Peter, Edmund, and Susan, and their adventures in the mystical world of Narnia. Sent to the British countryside for their own safety during the blitz of World War II, they discover an entryway into a mystical world through an old wardrobe. Narnia is inhabited by mythical, anthropomorphic creatures suffering under the hundred-year rule of the cruel White Witch (Tilda Swinton, in a standout role). The arrival of the children gives the creatures of Narnia hope for liberation, and all are dragged into the inevitable conflict between evil (the Witch) and good (Aslan the Lion, the Messiah figure, regally voiced by Liam Neeson).

Director (and co-screenwriter) Andrew Adamson, a veteran of the Shrek franchise, knows his way around a fantasy-based adventure story, and he wisely keeps the story moving when it could easily become bogged down and tiresome. Narnia is, of course, a Christian allegory and the symbology is definitely there (as it should be, otherwise it wouldn't be the story Lewis wrote), but audiences aren't knocked over the head with it, and in the hands of another director it could easily have become pedantic. The focus is squarely on the children and their adventures. The four young actors are respectable in their roles, especially considering the size of the project put on their shoulders, but it's the young Georgie Henley as the curious Lucy who stands out. This isn't a film that wildly succeeds, and in the long run it won't have the same impact as the Harry Potter franchise, but it is well done, and kids will get swept up in the adventure. Note: Narnia does contain battle scenes that some parents may consider too violent for younger children. --Dan Vancini

Description

Prepare to enter another world when Walt Disney Pictures and Walden Media present C.S. Lewis' timeless and beloved adventure. With the stunningly realistic special effects, you'll experience the exploits of Lucy, Edmund, Susan, and Peter, four siblings who find the world of Narnia through a magical wardrobe while playing a game of "hide-and-seek" at the country estate of a mysterious professor. Once there, the children discover a charming, once peaceful land inhabited by talking beasts, dwarfs, fauns, centaurs, and giants that has been turned into a world of eternal winter by the evil White Witch, Jadis. Aided by the wise and magnificent lion Aslan, the children lead Narnia into a spectacular climactic battle to be free of the Witch's glacial powers forever! The Chronicles of Narnia, Narnia, and all other book titles, characters and locales original thereto are trademarks of C.S. Lewis Pte Ltd. and are used with permission. © Disney/Walden

Customer Reviews:

THE BEST OF FANTASY AND MAGIC!!!.......2007-09-07

how could anyone give this film a low rate. what?? i don't get it. excellent picture i absolutely loved it. it had a huge dose of magic, tons of fantasy, and a tad bit of reality. this is for both children and adults, and very enjoyable by both. the story is great, the whole setup, the animals, everything was beautiful. their imagination really went out of the roof with this one. it had four young children, a magic wardrobe, talking lion, icy witch, the cutest beavers, and just about any other imaginable animal you can think of. it's good against evil, and the prophecy will be fulfilled. if you have not seen it, it is a must see. this story just makes you want more of it. i expected good, but not great. and this sure greatly exceeded my expectations. it's okay to escape reality every now and then. first there was neverland and now there's narnia. it's movies like this that make you wish these place really exsisted. just a short 135 minute escape from the real world.

Well done........2007-09-04

I was hesitant to put too much confidence in this movie, as I have been disappointed by book-to-movie translations in the past. However, this movie was very well done, keeping the points in the movie that the book emphasized. and doing a good job with it. There are no digital effects that look hokey; they are all well done.

I highly suggest all families see this movie. The message of one person laying thier life on the line to save others is strong, especially for kids (and adults) that live in our self-centered world.

Get this movie, and watch it over and over.

A Picturesque Fairy Tale.......2007-08-28

This has all the elements of a classic fairy tale: the entry into another world through the wall of a closet, a witch who was power to freeze everyone, monsters, animal-like warriors, and the like.

Little Lucy finds a magic entrance through the back of a wardrobe. Not surprisingly, her older siblings scoff at her and say that she is living in a little-child's fantasy world. But they soon find out otherwise.

The initially frozen world of Narnia is graphically shown. Imagine living in a world that used to have seasons but is now a world in which winter never ends!

There is irony in this tale. Lucy and her siblings, who had been sent to live with a relative in the countryside in order to avoid the war (the German bombing of British cities) instead find themselves right in the middle of the war going on in Narnia.

The author, Clives Staples Lewis, intended a spiritual application for his tale. The parallel between the deaths of Astlan the Lion for rescuing the people from the power of the witch, and of Jesus Christ for the rescue of the world from Satan, is obvious.

An Excellent Version of TLTWATW.......2007-07-26

This is an excellent version of "The Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe". It is in wide screen format and includes additional scenes. The additional scenes in the battle were very well done, although the scene where Peter skewers a harpy in flight with a spear while riding at a full gallop stretches even this fantasy a bit - but it looked great!
The additional features were also very good. I especially liked the biography of CS Lewis. All in all, this was a wonderful package.

Cool Movie.......2007-07-17

Again Disney us a sorceress brings history adapted of one classic of the literature. Exelente dramatizations, magnificent special effects, movie that it(he,she) invites us as the former movies to dream. The typical fight between(among) the good and evil always they will be present and this one is not the eception.
Nuevamente Disney nos trae una magica historia adaptada de uno clasicos de la literatura. Exelente dramatizaciones, magnificos efectos especiales, pelicula que nos invita como las antiguas peliculas a soñar. La tipica lucha entre el bien y mal siempre estarán presentes y esta no es la ecepción.

Average customer rating:

One of my very favorite movies
Another must have
nice try
Very very good movie
A good coming out story

Get Real
Starring: Ben Silverstone , Brad Gorton , Charlotte Brittain , Stacy Hart , and Kate McEnery
Director: Simon Shore
Manufacturer: Paramount
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ASIN: 6305744777
Release Date: 2000-02-22

Amazon.com

Get Real begins with a couple of hedgehogs having sex, and deals with a topic just as prickly: gay love in adolescence. Steve (Ben Silverstone) is a student at a British school where everyone wears classy uniforms, knows he's gay, and is pretty comfortable being so. John (Brad Gorton), a top athlete and all-around admired guy, is just getting an inkling and isn't sure how he feels about it. This, cleverly, is how the movie manages to explore coming-out issues and be over them at the same time. In fact, the whole movie is pretty clever--witty dialogue, deft direction, nimble pacing, and clean editing--in exploring the seriousness of adolescent life without taking it too seriously. The key is in Silverstone's performance; he's a completely convincing mixture of hesitation and recklessness, all the conflicts of high school in one sweet-faced package. As the movie follows Steve and John's relationship--their evasions at school, getting picked up by the police in a park, goofing around in a heated swimming pool, grappling with coming out to the world at large--it lays out a bit of contrast with Steve's best friend Linda (Charlotte Brittain), who's as unapologetically fat as Steve is gay, and who's having an affair with her driving instructor. Excellent performances all around, funny, sexy, charming--if only straight teen comedies were half this good. Get Real even demonstrates the proper etiquette when soliciting sex in public restrooms; what more can you ask for? --Bret Fetzer

Customer Reviews:

One of my very favorite movies.......2007-06-30

I love this movie. It's one of those magical little Brit flicks in which everything just works. It's also one of the very few films that I can watch again and again (with intervals of a few months in between) and still feel the same kind of emotional response.

No doubt much of my reaction is personal, and I suspect this movie is pretty much a gay thing. It may even be more specialized than that -- a gay thing for people who aren't American idiots, which would rule out much of the audience for teen-oriented entertainment, as evidenced by a couple of the more vapid reviews in this thread. So be warned if you are (a) straight, (b) stupid, (c) unable to tolerate non-Hollywood fare, or some ungodly combination of the above.

Another must have.......2007-06-26

What a great movie! Great acting. Humor where you wouldn't expect it. A movie that makes you think. And what a great line to almost end the movie with: "It's just love! What is everyone so afraid of?" Not only was it entertaining, but I bought it at an apropos point in my life, and it has helped me during a couple of struggles. Wonderful when a movie can be thoroughly entertaining, insightful, and personally helpful.

nice try.......2007-05-24

Almost hit the mark, deals with some serious issues, and funny in parts, but not extremly convincing. Still worth a spin, but needed some better casting.

Very very good movie.......2007-03-18

This movie is about sadness, love, lies, loneliness, rumors and abusive!! This movie got me heartache and I almost cry the whole time. If you have never seen this movie oh my my!! You should buy it and see it for yourself!!

A good coming out story.......2007-03-17

I enjoyed this movie quite a bit because it nicely depicted the complications that arise from being in the closet, ultimately coming out, and having to deal with the sad consequences of someone else's failure to be honest and truthful. Of course it's tough to be "real" when that is exactly what friends, family, and society often don't want to see, but in the long run it is just so much better than trying to live a lie and make yourself believe this is okay. In the film, I thought the writer did a nice job of showing how some people who appear to have everything actually end up with very little of true value while the "outcasts" often shine with true grit and integrity. Overall, this is a feel-good movie with a mostly good ending. The characters are great. You'll like it!

Average customer rating:

Extremely Brilliant , Complainers for this are hypocrits!
Falls short again
Hellraiser-Deader.....Direct to Video for a reason.
Endurable B-movie instalment in tired saga
Not great.

Hellraiser - Deader
Starring: Kari Wuhrer , Paul Rhys , Simon Kunz , Marc Warren , and Georgina Rylance
Director: Rick Bota
Manufacturer: Dimension
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B0007US7BC
Release Date: 2005-06-07

Description

HELLRAISER: DEADER is the latest, most terrifying chapter in the wildly frightening HELLRAISER legacy! Once again, the ultimate evil -- the dreaded Pinhead (Doug Bradley -- HELLRAISER franchise) -- leads an army of the dead who come back to life with a bloodthirsty vengeance! For an undercover reporter (Kari Wuhrer -- PROPHECY: UPRISING) who becomes entangled with the deadly underground group responsible for the malevolent resurrections, any moment could be her last! With Pinhead in all his gory glory, the thrilling villain you love to fear delivers another hellish nightmare you'll never forget!

Customer Reviews:

Extremely Brilliant , Complainers for this are hypocrits!.......2007-04-18

This movie is a great horror!/Suspense!
All these people complaining about this are lame just looking for an excuse to complain!

First of all,All you so called Hellraiser fans,Pin head only appears in the first Hellraiser movie for about 5 minutes total also!So why are you complaining?

This Has an excellent plot to it,The production is nice,The acting is good,And even if this wasn't a hellraiser movie it is still a great story.
Especially for a true horror fan!!!

Falls short again.......2007-01-06

3.5 Stars. I don't think the writers/producers get this Hellraiser series. The entire idea of Hellraiser is to have Pinhead in the scenes because he is one of the scariest, most curious characters in horror. Again, he isn't shown enough. I want to see him lurking out of the darkness and showing up in flashbacks and threatening people.

The theme of the movie isn't bad: It's about a guy who can bring people back to life once they've been coaxed into killing themselves and he's been annointed by Pinhead to do this. All of these people are called "Deaders".

The strangest and most mysterious part(s) of the movie is when a journalist (Kari Wuhrer) checks all of this out and enters the subway and gets on a subway train which is a trashy hedonistic palace/chamber to get information from a fellow. The costumes and people on the subway are freaks and you can't take it all in because there's too much going on: there's sex and drugs and mutilation taking place among small groups of people.

Kari Wuhrer puts in a great performance I think, especially when she becomes one of the "deaders" and it freaks her out because she's bleeding everywhere she goes.

The climax always falls short in these Hellraiser movies for some reason. When Pinhead confronts Kari at the end she takes the box and says, "Go to Hell!" and throws the box. I still have no idea what this gesture means to Pinhead because it sends him into complete madness but it happens in every Hellraiser movie.(?) I mean all he has to do is walk over and pick it up!!! What's the big deal? My suggestion would be to end a Hellraiser movie differently by letting Pinhead torture someone physically or mentally for ten minutes or so and make the ending more complex.

Could have been much better but check it out.

Hellraiser-Deader.....Direct to Video for a reason........2006-07-08

Ever since Hellraiser:Bloodline(4) all subsequent sequels have been direct to video. Why? well Hellraiser: Inferno, Hellraiser: Hellseeker, and this installment Hellraiser:Deader have used the same premise; screw with you head. In the first 4 films it was that when you solved the puzzle box you summoned Pinhead and crew, got hook chained back into hell. With the exception of a couple delusions/hallucinations that was basically it. In #5 on it changed you opened the box and you went on this mad journey through you own psychosis, almost like a dream where your mind is manufacturing things and at the same time Pinhead and the powers of hell are supplying their own special effects. I'm not feeling all that.
In Deader we have the lovely and talented Kari Wuher playing Amy Klien reporter for a paper called the London Underground. She gets an asignment to check out the Deaders after watching Deader front man "Winter" bring some chick back to life. Taking place in Romania Klein acquires the puzzle box and solves it, sending her on her own little psychotic journey into her own personal hell. As with #5 and 6 the big mystery for Klien is figuring out what the hell is going on, is she crazy or not and why does this Winter guy possess the ability he has to bring the dead back to life......whatever! Trying to follow her mental break path to hell is a waste of time. Just let the movie unfold as it does and all--however thin will be revealed. For Fans of Pinhead, yes Doug Bradley reprises his role as the brooding darkly poetic, and articulate Cenobite. Pinheads presence in the first half of this 88 minute outing is nil. The second half has a bit more but not much.
Some of the effects in this film are I think not up to snuff, like the Cgi chains that pinhead uses. However Makeup jobs are cool, and there is a fair amount of blood being spilt. which make for some disturbing visuals, I found myself saying; "Dang, thats messed up!" a few times in this Film. Overall for a direct to video sequel, Kari Wuher does a great job, and its always good to see Pinhead warp reality and twist words. For those reasons I went from 2 to 3 stars. Bottom Line.....Stronger sequel that Both Hellraiser: Inferno, and Hellraiser: Hellseeker.

Endurable B-movie instalment in tired saga.......2006-07-02

Hellraiser: Deader is the eighth (or so) in the series kicked off by Clive Barker's cinematic magnum opus of gore: Hellraiser, which brought to eighties audiences the ultimate slasher villain: the immortal, vain and verbose Pinhead. This film, however, is far removed from the master's original vision of a pleasure-seekers' purgatory.

More importantly for fans, the series' Cenobites, grotesque, pleasure-and-pain-inflicting supernatural entities led by Pinhead, do not appear at all, except in the DVD extras, and the storyline itself was clearly intended to be a Pinhead-free affair. That is, until the Dimension straight-to-DVD department signed a cheque and made a sensible commercial decision to adapt the story for the Hellraiser canon.

I certainly am not one to be riled by capitalism and its inherent compromises, and this film unquestionably presents decent, low-grade genre fare, with an easily-digestable side of gore.

Our lead screamer, Kari Wuhrer, an exploitation-film actress who found fame on the syndicated Sliders TV show, is watchable, overcoming some dodgy dialogue and terrible costumes. Shot in Romania, no doubt for budgetary reasons, the film-makers manage to find several spooky locations and evoke a cool, wrong-side-of-the-iron-curtain creepiness throughout proceedings.

The plot is as follows: a star writer for a sleazy Fleet Street (London) tabloid begins to investigate a strange cult of young people in Bucharest, who appear to rise from the dead after having committed ritualistic suicide. Hellraising elements become merely an adjunct to our self-destructive heroine's temptation by, and ultimate victory over, these nasty young hedonists: the "Deaders".

Solid production values - considering what it is - and a moderately interesting underlying concept, see this film make the grade (just) as far as this horror fan is concerned. And, while reduced to side-show status, the Hellraiser cycle's iconic bad-guy does get to spout a few lines and chuck a few chains around, even if the lines are uninspired and the chains cheesy CGI.

Nonetheless, it really is hard to get past those shocking costumes the film-makers force our leading lady into. Beautiful as she is, Wuhrer is no teenager, and the character she is playing is portrayed as younger than she clearly is. But decking her out in boots and grunge jackets and tying her hair into goofy teen styles does not mask her age, it just looks ridiculous. And what single woman, travelling alone, wears a man's shirt (and no bra) to bed? Really, it was all highly alienating! Call me unreasonable or unfair, but I am rounding down the 2½ stars just for that.

I cannot recommend you buy the DVD, but check out your local video library for some guilty, spooky pleasures, then make a decision as to whether you want Hellraiser: Deader in you collection.

Not great........2006-06-30

I love the hellraiser series, and I can honestly say I was dissapointed in this installment. It was boring, slow, and had bad visual effects (CGI chains, what the hell is that?).
But the worst thing by far is that Pinhead was hardly in it. I dunno what's going on with the series but it seems that in every installment, we see Pinhead less and less.
The only reason I'm giving this 2 stars is because it doesn't even come close to the piece of garbage the INFERNO was...
Thank God for Hellworld...which isn't an amazing film, but still better then the last few sequels.

Average customer rating:

Juan Carlos Tabýo has done it again
A Lesson for Life
An Allegory of the Potential Latent in Common Interest
A Major Message from a Simple Story
BEST CUBAN FILM SINCE MEMORIES OF THE UNDER DEVELOPMENT

Waiting List
Starring: Vladimir Cruz , Thaimí Alvariño , Jorge Perugorría , Noel García , and Alina Rodríguez
Director: Juan Carlos Tabío
Manufacturer: Fox Lorber
ProductGroup: DVD
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ASIN: B000244FNM
Release Date: 2004-07-20

Description

At a rundown bus station in rural Cuba, the line of passengers waiting just keeps getting longer. The problem is that every bus that passes by is already full. Their only hope is to wait for the station's bus to be fixed. As the disparate group settles in, relationships start forming between the passengers: Emilio (Vladimir Cruz), a young engineer, becomes smitten with a beautiful young woman (Thaimi Alvarino) who is en route to meet her Spanish fiancé, a blind man (Jorge Perugorria) gets support from the others to go to the head of the line. Frustration and disorder reign when the one bus brakes down and no one can leave. Resigned to working together, the group magically transforms the station into a beautiful place where no one wants to leave. Award-winning director Juan Carlos Tabío (Strawberry and Chocolate) successfully blends magical realism and social commentary in this crowd-pleasing romantic comedy. DVD: 5.1, Interview/Making Of, subtitle control, trailer, weblinks

Customer Reviews:

Juan Carlos Tabýo has done it again .......2006-04-09

In case you are not familiar with the name, it was Juan Carlos Tab?o who co-directed Tom?s Guti?rrez Alea's last two films ("Strawberry & Chocolate" and "Guantanamera"). I highly recommend THEM as well.

Tab?o's films are definitely NOT for the average audience in the United States. Most of us are too braindead to appreciate his brilliant creativity and his subtle messages. But for those of us old enough to appreciate the films created in Hollywood prior to Star Wars, and for those of us who appreciate slightly offbeat plots and outstanding character development, Juan Carlos Tab?o's films are a treasure.

Tab?o is a genius whose comprehension of human nature is as keen as Steinbeck's. But that is where the similarity ends. His sense of irony takes his plots into the realm of "theatre of the absurd". Or is it just the absurdity of LIFE that accomplishes this FOR him? Here, passengers are trapped in a remote bus terminal -- the buses always pass full, and none of the awaiting passengers can board. They are stranded. And how they -- as typically resourceful Cubans -- deal with this situation is the rest of the story, part of it dream, and part of it real, but ... which is WHICH? And once they DO get the chance to leave the terminal, do they really WANT to? Or have the relationships they've established become more enduring than the one's they knew outside of the terminal? Is the terminal a microcosmic analogy for the island of Cuba itself? Determine that for yourself as you enjoy this brilliantly conceived and brilliantly produced movie.

This is a heavy film, but with plenty of humourous moments. It includes many of Cuba's finest actors, and a script written by one of the greatest directors in the world. DON'T MISS IT.

A Lesson for Life.......2005-07-21

This movie develops in a Cuban Bus Terminal when a bunch of people find themselves stocked there because the only autobus available for service is broken. With no other choice, the terminal is now their home. For me, it was like the cuban version of "The Terminal". The film contains a pretty straightforward message: A Happy life is not about what you have, it is about what you share.

An Allegory of the Potential Latent in Common Interest.......2005-03-21

Waiting List is an excellent allegory on how the recognition of common interest, especially under conditions of scarcity, can naturally lead to collective action that benefits all in ways not imagined initially.

The movie opens at a bus station where would-be passengers selfishly compete for the few seats on the buses that stop at the station en route to other destinations. The figure of the scarcities produced by capitalist economies is obvious.

The bus station has its own bus, but it is broken down. The necessity of repairing the bus, as well as finding food to feed everyone stranded at the bus station for several days, causes the would-be passengers to move from understanding their interests individually and selfishly to understanding them collectively. Once they realize their interests collectively, the characters and their aspirations are transformed in a manner that seems natural.

At first a few qualified leaders emerge to harness the collective will and interests of the passengers by motivating them and providing them direction. However, in due course the leadership "withers away" because the passengers begin to actualize their unique talents and potential for the common good--abilities, in some cases, that have lain dormant for years. This is an apparent analogy to the Marxist belief that socialist societies will require the direction of a vanguard of communist visionaries and leaders until a communist societies evolve which require no leadership at all. In my view, the plot's ability to allegorize the naturalness of this evolution is its best achievement.

In time the passengers transform the bus station physically and spiritually as well. The bus station ceases to be a point of departure and becomes a point of arrival because the passengers discover community, solidarity, love and sustenance simply by pursuing their common interests collectively. The bus station becomes home, and the passengers want to remain in the community that the bus station provides because the solidarity and equality they've discovered is now understood as what they've really wanted all of their lives. The movie pulls all of this off masterfully.

But then the film surprises us. We discover that the events (the substance of the allegory) were a collective dream held by the passengers during the course of one night. Yet the dream alone, absent its realization, benefits the passengers in obvious ways. They now relate to one another out of their awakened sense of common interest and altruism as demonstrated by the help they provide one another to travel to their separate destinations. In essence, once the film persuades us that this communistic society was real, it then jolts us with the realization that such a society is as yet an unrealized dream. We are brought back to reality (to the circumstances that opened the film), but now reality is charged with the potential of collective fulfillment.

I have one issue with the film. During the dream sequence, one of the characters dies. The death seems to have no purpose other than to make the film's message about the possibility of collective fulfillment explicit during the stationmaster's eulogy. The film could trust itself more. It doesn't need to explicitly "tell" us its message. It has masterfully shown us its message already.

This is another Cuban film of remarkable acting, direction, subtlety and insight. It is well worth purchasing.

A Major Message from a Simple Story.......2005-03-08

Writer/Director Juan Carlos Tabio ('Strawberry and Chocolate', 'Guantanamera', etc) brings to Cuban cinema a very special quality of color and light that makes the people of this island appear to have their priorities better in line than in countries without the problems of dictatorship. Written with Senel Paz based on a story by Arturo Aranjo, WAITING LIST is a film about how people respond under less than positive circumstances and how such interaction produces community and understanding and love.

Set in a dilapidated seaside bus station Tabio sets in motion his story with the arrival of Emilio (Vladimir Cruz - memorable for his work with Tabio in 'Strawberry and Chocolate'), a handsome and kind Engineer who, having agreed to work his ailing father's farm until he can afford to return to his career for which he has been studying, seeks to travel to his country home. The station is full of irate people, each arguing a case for who should be first on the next bus to pass through. It seems the station's own bus is inoperable and the people must wait for the rare other buses to take them to Havana or to Santiago.

The group of people include a variety of ages, many who have lost their dreams, some who are belligerently self-centered, a 'blind man' Rolando (Jorge Perugorria - also from 'Strawberry and Chocolate') who is faking being blind to gain favor with the others, a bruja who guarantees resolution to any problems by using her herbs, two men who appear inseparable and very young in their view of life, mothers with children, retired couples missing the love of youth, etc. The stationmaster tries to calm the crowd, finally 'fixing 'the station bus, only to have it collapse again!

Emilio and Rolando slowly engage the stranded folk and convince them the bus can be fixed. During all this time Emilio has his eye on Jacqueline (Thaimi Alvarino - a very fine and sensuous actress) who is panicked that she will not make it to Havana to me her fiancé who is coming from Madrid to marry her: Jacqueline is obviously likewise attracted to the handsome kind stranger! Once the focus of the mission to repair the bus is established, the newly friendly folk set about to make the best of what they have. Night comes, all sleep, and at this point Tabio transforms his story with Latin American Magical Realism that is as tender, celebratory and lovely as any on film.

The ending of the story has to do with waking up to reality and how the shared dream has transformed the lives of everyone. To say more would dispel some of the magic this film holds. The acting is superb, the atmosphere is both very real and very imagined, and it all works extremely well. This little film is a breath of fresh Caribbean air! Grady Harp, March 05

BEST CUBAN FILM SINCE MEMORIES OF THE UNDER DEVELOPMENT.......2004-11-25

It is a testament to the producers and writers they were able to do this film in a way that did not ruffle the feathers of state sensors. The movie is a delightful story for all ages and is able to poke fun at how people living in a dysfunctional governmental system are able to over come challenges. Films such as these show that big budgets do not always equal big quality. Hollywood can learn from the Third World Film Industry.

Average customer rating:

Raped by the devil...the devil sucks in bed.
The key to getting a girlfriend
No Sleeping In THESE Pews!...
Errr
Italian horror art

The Church
Starring: Tomas Arana , Asia Argento , Roberto Caruso , Feodor Chaliapin Jr. , and Roberto Corbiletto
Manufacturer: Anchor Bay
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B00005RYLA
Release Date: 2002-02-19

Customer Reviews:

Raped by the devil...the devil sucks in bed........2007-08-09

I'm not gonna lie...the ONLY reason i ordered this is because i seen a preview on cemetary man showing this naked woman being violated by a full prosthetic application GOAT--MAN--DEVIL....THATS IT. perhaps my anticipation for glorious ritualistic beast nasties killed my having interest in anything else....like storylines and characters...it was all in all from what i remember, a religious thriller with some shock scares hidden in there. its worth $5, which i believe i paid.....but if you're NOT buying it because its an ARGENTO classic(like demons 1 and 2..and you ARE buying it for the same reason i did...which is wrong...then i don't recommend it.

The key to getting a girlfriend.......2007-02-20

What got me interested in this movie was (like so many horror movies) the front cover of the DVD box. It pictured a dimly lit church interior, with a mass of dead bodies piled together in the shape of a devil's head. I suggest you find that online, because it's probably the coolest idea ever thought of in terms of set design for a horror movie. It's also probably the coolest thing in this entire film.

I was always a bit confused about who made this movie when I did research on it. I heard it was done by Dario Argento (who made the horror classics "Deep Red" and "Suspiria") and I'd also heard it was done by a protege of his. It turns out the story and script were worked on by Dario Argento (along with some other people) but that it was directed by Michele Soavi. (the protege, I assume) Knowing Dario Argento had a hand in all this, however, only depressed me more by the end of it.

The film opens in the Middle Ages. The Teutonic Knights uncover a village inhabited by a demonic cult. They wipe out every one in the village and decide to build a church over the mass grave.

Cut to modern day...uh...I think it's supposed to be America but the police wear Italian uniforms and most of the characters are undoubtedly dubbed. The church is currently being rennovated, and it has a new librarian named Evan. Evan finds out about a secret tomb buried under the church, and figures (as per horror movie tradition) that there must be gold or artifacts underneath and it requires him to open it without any one else knowing. This, of course, unleashes the evil spirits from the tomb, and boy are they PO'd! They possess one of the church workers and force him to sacrifice himself (via jackhammer seppukku) which sets off a mechanism that locks the door and traps the people inside the church. (the group consisting of a photography shoot, a school on a field trip, some bikers, and the church staff) It turns out the architect of the church designed it intentionally to trap the spirits should they ever be released - people trapped inside be damned. (no pun intended)

Now granted, there are some major plotholes regarding this. First, it's later revealed there are holes and tunnels that go under the church - so why aren't the demons escaping from the church that way? Second, the only one who knows this is the daughter of one of the church workers - you're telling me the other people who work there and whose sole job is to maintain, monitor, and in general work in the church did NOT know about it? Oh yeah...and if they find it important to leave the church, why not break some of the first story windows and go get help? I mean c'mon, the church is being rennovated any way.

As a horror film - let alone a movie in general - this movie fails on a lot of levels. There are some well done monster effects (especially a goat demon that gets lucky in one scene - and no that's not a cheap hentai joke) but they really do nothing for a film that isn't all that scary in the least. To top it off, the part with the people trapped in the church was absolutely stupid. The only reason the demons manage to kill them all is because of how stupid they are - people wander off alone and characters will either die, act weird, or get mutilated and no one will seem to care, let alone notice. I think I can see why the demons were conquered so easily in the first place: they rely on their victims being absolutely stupid. If their enemy is actually competant (like the Teutonic knights) then they're easily defeated.

Actually, the way they're contained is stupid enough. If the church is so worried about the demons being unleashed to possess humanity, why don't they put a better lock on the door to hell? (at least something better than an overdecorated manhole cover) Why don't they put a guard on there 24/7? (hey, the Teutonic Knights could've guarded it - and they're still around too!) Why don't they make sure to tell people to stay clear of the entrance? There has to be a better way to keep the devil in than using a lid that any fool passing by could just lift up.

By the way, this movie has some of the worst dialogue applied to film. For example, when Evan goes into the church for the first time and meets Lisa, the rennovator, their dialogue goes like this:

Evan: "What a divine fresco. Which way is the library?"
Lisa: *points*
Evan: "Hey, how about a cup of coffee later?"
Lisa: "OK!"

Ten minutes later they almost have sex. Give me a break! If the world worked like this, I would have had sex with ten women before I'd finished this review. Also, as a historical buff I was offended by this following dialogue describing the Teutonic knights:

Evan: "A military religious order that defended the pilgrams in the Holy Land at the time of the Crusades. They later took over half of Europe - their cruelty became legendary...they appealed a lot to the Nazis. Hitler drew his inspiration from them when he founded the SS. The Iron Cross, his favorite decoration, was modeled on the black cross of the Teutonic Knights."

WHAT?! First off, they NEVER owned half of Europe - let alone any size close to that! Second off, I'm not aware of anything that inspired Hitler to make the SS after them, in fact the use of the Teutonic Knights by the Nazis was propaganda, just as it was to use Wagner's music. Finally, the Iron Cross was a German decoration a hundred years before Hitler came to power, and had been a symbol in Prussia and many other Germanic nations for some time. By the way, Evan is telling this to Lisa - the rennovator! You're telling me a rennovator of Medieval castles doesn't even have an inkling on who the Teutonic Knights were?

The only real saving grace of this film are the few clever moments, and the soundtrack. The music was done by the Italian band the Goblins, which did the music for Dario Argento's "Deep Red" and "Suspiria," and it's a nice theme for this film. It uses electronic instruments but retains a kind of eerie church-like atmosphere. And, admittedly, Michele Soavi can set up scenes nicely, as the shots of the church interior and exterior give a great sense of space and size. Unfortunately, all this isn't enough to save the film. So just refer back to my first paragraph, follow what I tell you, and go one with your daily routine - you'll thank me for it. Others may say I'm being harsh and picking on some small points - I call it using logic.

By the way, if you do see the movie, catch the part where Lisa jumps through her house window. It's so hilarious. She leaps through the window like a professional high-diver taking a plunge, and goes through it wearing only a nightgown without getting a scratch.

No Sleeping In THESE Pews!..........2007-01-25

Yep, the splatter scenes are here! Especially memorable are the "Sledgehammer Suicide", "Subway-train Facial", and "Bell-ringing Granny" sequences! However, this movie isn't just for gorehündts, as it also has a cool story and the world's creepiest church building for atmosphere! A group of people, including a bride and groom, their wedding party, an elementary school tour-group, 2 bikers, and 3 priests end up trapped inside the church. Little do they know that demonic forces have been unleashed in order to fulfill a centuries old curse! THE CHURCH is a strong entry in the demon holocaust movie sub-genre. Services begin at midnight. Don't be late...

Errr.......2006-12-03

Weird movie! Odd monsters, cool concept, some gore, and a girl that everyone calls Latte or Lotte or something. Its has to do knights gruesomely slaughtering people which is gruesomely shown at the beginning(decapitations, impaling) all because they were some satanic tribe. Then the build a cathedral over their grave to bless the land. Well it ain't working in the future. I personally rented cuz of dario argento. Wasn't what i was expecting but ok movie.

Rated Nr but should be rated R for horror violence/gore, brief bizarre sexuality/nudity, and some language

Italian horror art.......2006-10-27

THE CHURCH

Review by Nickolas Cook

In medieval Europe, a band of crusading knights massacre a village of suspected devil worshippers, and then build a large gothic church atop the cursed remains.
Flash-forward to present day, to the still-standing elaborate cathedral, as a visiting historian uncovers an ancient bit of parchment that helps him unlock the basement crypt/doorway to Hell. Archaic mechanisms click into place, trapping a group of people inside the church as all Hell breaks loose.
Co-written and produced by maestro Dario Argento (Suspiria), THE CHURCH helped to cement the reputation of director Michele Soavi (Stagefright, Cemetery Man, two fantastic horror flicks of incredible visceral humor and intelligence) as the new master of Italian horror. This was originally intended to be a spinoff of Bava and Argento's DEMONS and its sequel, and was known as DEMONS 3, but the studio decied after seeing its complexity and stunning visual to release it as a standalone picture instead.
All I can say is: if you've never seen this one, you're missing a hell of a visual treat. Anchor Bay take this underrated classic of Italian horror and really give it the tender lovin' care it deserves for a DVD release. The full screen is especially awesome during those sprawling architectural trawl shots that Soavi uses to wonderful effect. The sound is enhanced, so even a regular television still picks up those little nuances that make the background sound work so well. And the music...WOW! How can you pass up a chance to hear not just the great idols of Italian horror soundtracks, Goblin, but also Keith Emerson? The music plays like another character to the story, as it winds and insinuates itself throughout Soavi's dark scenery.
A very young Asia Argento turns up as Latia, daughter to the abusive church maintenance man. The rest of the cast gives great performances as the church begins to eat them up, one at a time.
There are two scenes in particular that I'd like to point out, and they stand for me as demarcations in THE CHURCH, cinematic moments that tell you that the people who put them together knew their business visually, and knew that what they were doing was bigger than themselves. They're both towards the end. One is a full screen shot of a man who has become a demon. He's winged and even has a winding Boa Constrictor-like tail. The shot is so sweet for a horror fan that it'll bring tears to your eyes.
And if that one doesn't do it, then the second shot will for sure.
It's a full head-shot of a demon rising from the crypt beneath the church. But the head is made up of dozens of people hanging together on this massive framework to give the subtle impression of a demon's face slowly coming up from Hell.
Incredible.
As I said, Anchor Bay really puts their hearts and souls into this one, folks. They even present it uncut, uncensored and fully restored from the original vault materials. THE CHURCH is a must-own for true-blue horror fans, and for anyone who loves the pure visual beauty of film.

--Nickolas Cook

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The best movie of the decade?
The Death of Mr. Lazarescu
Getting the Run-Around in ERs ...
A Dantesque odyssey
Black comedy? White tragedy? Either way, it's great.

The Death of Mr. Lazarescu
Starring: Ion Fiscuteanu , Luminita Gheorghiu , Gabriel Spahiu , Doru Ana , and Dana Dogaru
Director: Cristi Puiu
Manufacturer: Tartan Video
ProductGroup: DVD
Binding: DVD

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ASIN: B000GBEWMA
Release Date: 2006-09-12

Amazon.com

The Death of Mr. Lazarescu is a sadly funny film that tells the story of an old man whom no one really knows or cares about. When he falls ill and needs medical treatment, he faces a team of busy doctors who are concerned because they have to be, not because they really care. Running just over 2-1/2 hours, this Romanian film allows the viewer to visualize how suffocatingly slow time must seem for Lazarescu (Ion Fiscuteanu), who isn't expecting the best treatment--just any treatment would be nice. With the exception of a conscientious paramedic, there doesn't seem to be much concern whether he lives or dies. TV viewers have been weaned on medical dramas such as ER, Chicago Hope, and House--all of which depict physicians who will go to all lengths to cure their patients. While noble and entertaining, these series probably offer less realism than The Death of Mr. Lazarescu, in which lack of funds and staff don't allow time for suitable bedside manner. No one is vilified, not even some of the hospital staff that is disgusted by the side effects of their patients' illnesses. The story is well told in a humane and mesmerizing manner that yanks at the heartstrings while still eliciting a laugh or two. --Jae-Ha Kim

Customer Reviews:

The best movie of the decade?.......2007-08-11

It is difficult to review this movie without giving any spoilers. The movie starts with Mr. Lazarescu in his apartment. Like the other characters in the movie, I smirk at his foibles and knowingly chide him for not taking better care of himself. Next he is in the ambulance and touring the city's hospitals. I laugh at the bureaucracy he encounters, the vanity of the doctors, and the petty concerns of the health care workers. It seems distant because he is in Romania and I am in the USA but it is nonetheless quite familiar. Romanian health care seems inefficient and ineffective but nonetheless benign because the participants seem unaware of the consequences of their actions and thereby somehow less responsible. And then in one moment in one scene it is made completely clear that the participants are in fact completely aware of the consequences of their actions. The participants are going to let Mr. Lazarescu die through their deliberate and inadvertent actions and inactions. He will die for their convenience and carelessness and pettiness. That at the end of the day, Mr. Lazarescu has been murdered but no one individual or group can or will be held accountable. In that moment my amusement turned to a silent grim horror that grew and grew until the inevitable conclusion of the movie. This is a rare and unique movie that reveals the true horror of the banal everyday evil that surrounds us in our lives. When I think back of all the movies made in the past decade, this one stands out stronger in my mind every day.

The Death of Mr. Lazarescu.......2007-07-25

Dubbed a "black comedy with serious side effects," Puiu's docu-realistic Romanian gem really nails the discouraging absurdities of modern-day health care, while rendering the bleak realities of chronic disease, loneliness, and mortality with an equally jaundiced eye. The grizzled Fiscuteanu is perfectly forlorn as Lazarescu, a man who elicits chiding lectures on his excessive drinking from his pitying (or indifferent) neighbors, and who appears to be a grudging afterthought to most of the doctors who bother to examine him. Grim and heartbreaking in its cumulative effect, "Lazarescu" is a hypnotic real-time odyssey with a morbid sense of humor.

Getting the Run-Around in ERs ..........2007-07-12

Mr. Lazarescu is an elderly man living in a rather messy apartment with several cats in Bucharest, Romania. He has some health problems and seeks the help of neighbors whose suggestions do not improve his condition. His only daughter emigrated to Canada, so she is too far away to help. It takes some convincing on his part via the phone to get the ambulance to come but they eventually understand his needs. The female ambulance worker shows some compassion, examines him and takes him to the nearest hospital.

Unfortunately, there was a multi-car crash involving a bus on the freeway and many accident victims are taken to the emergency rooms (ERs) of nearby hospitals. The ER was packed and very busy. Mr. Lazaescu gets a quick exam but what he really ends up with is a lecture to stop drinking and he would get better. The ambulance personnel realize he is in pain and needs help ... so they take him to the next hospital. At the next facility, the personnell, both MDs, nurses, and technicians are rather indifferent and treat the female ambulance worker rather shabbily. Eventually, they do a somewhat better exam and agree on a diagnosis. They recommend a CT scan which can not be done in their facility because they do not have the equipment. They are given the necessary paperwork and move on to a third hospital. At this better equipped hospital, Mr. Lazarescu gets his tests not becasue he *should* nor because it is the right thing to do but *only* because the female ambulance worker has some "pull". She knows one of the healthcare workers who arranges for the test to be done immediatly.

A CT scan of the head is done showing he has a serious problem ... the matter is urgent. The physician tries to talk Mr. Lazarescu into having surgery. With much difficulty, they end up convincing him to sign the surgical permit/operating consent. There is no effort made to notify the next of kin or get their permission. It does not seem to matter that Mr. Lazarescu has no understanding of his condition nor is he aware of what he agreed to. Some OR technicians indifferently prepare him for surgery ...

The film reveals the failures of a socialized healthcare system via dark humor. It shows how inhumane, cold and uncaring people can be who have no sense of responsibility or accountability to the patient. Mr. Lazarescu is not given respect or shown compassion. The indifference to his plight is appalling. No one seems sensitive to his healthcare problems except the female ambulance worker. It seemed like a camera crew was filming the the true and actual events in the life of this man. The acting was superb by the main characters as well as by all the healthcare workers. The film is a huge success because one can see the insensitivity, the lack of guilt, the self-absorption of the healthcare workers and unfortunately these attitudes *can* develop in any healthcare system, not just in the socialized type. While the shuttling of Mr. Lazarescu from one hospital ER to the next would *not* occur in the U.S.A. due to EMTALA laws, the fact is under *any* healthcare system the care of the elderly patients can suffer and erode into indifference. While I hope the film is exaggerating the truth, sadly one can see how something similar *can* happen to the elderly and helpless, who have no one looking out for their interests. Erika Borsos [pepper flower]

A Dantesque odyssey .......2007-06-13

Great depiction of Universal Health (HELL) Care that so many politicians are currently advocating!!

Black comedy? White tragedy? Either way, it's great........2007-05-12

The Death of Mr. Lazarescu (Cristi Puiu, 2005)

When, at the end of a film, you are pounding on things, throwing things across the room, and yelling how you're going to fly across the ocean and strangle the director, there is one inescapable conclusion to be reached: that film has done its job, and admirably. The Death of Mr. Lazarescu does just that, though there is nothing at all admirable about the film itself; that is one of the sources of its power.

Lazarescu (Ion Fiscuteanu) is a sixty-two-year-old widower living in squalor with three cats. He gets up one morning with a headache, to which a stomachache is later added. Self-medication doesn't work, so he calls the hospital and asks them to send an ambulance. Thus begins a six-hour trip through the Romanian socialized health system that is absurd, outrageous, and all too plausible. Things are complicated by a massive bus crash that has every ER in Bucharest overflowing. Lazarescu's only champion is Mioara (Code Inconnu's Luminita Gheorghiou), the paramedic who originally came to pick him up.

It is all too easy to fall into identifying with Lazarescu and Mioara here, and Puiu has certainly given us some characters who embody everything that is horrible about medical care; I can't imagine anyone watching this movie and not watching to perform some amateur brain surgery on a couple of these doctors. I'm not sure, however, that that was the entirety of Puiu's intention here. If he's wanted to create a one-dimensional screed against the Romanian health care system, he'd have made it, well, a lot more one-dimensional. Instead, there are a number of health care workers here (Mioara is the most notable, but a number of the others are also praiseworthy) who, despite various levels of stress and exhaustion, do their best to make sure that Lazarescu gets the treatment he needs. While, ultimately, none of them are successful (and this is not a spoiler; the title of the film tells you all you need to know, doesn't it?), a number of them try. There's a lot more under the hood here than one might expect, given most reviews of the film to date. Matters are made worse by the ephemerality of the relationships everyone in the film, save Mioara, have with Lazarescu; none of the others is with him long enough to get a decent idea of his condition. We see him sliding further and further into dementia; the medical professionals, to a person, put it down to his being drunk. (And judging by the recipe for the alcohol he's been drinking given to Mioara by Lazarescu's neighbor at the beginning of the film, that's not entirely surprising.) The film is as frustrating for the fact that the viewer can understand the positions of both sides as it is for the horrendous way in which Lazarescu is treated.

I have to say that if this is an example of a Romanian comedy, I'd hate to see what they produce as a tearjerker. I've never seen a comedy this bleak. However, it's also the case that few comedies I've seen are anywhere near as compelling. I'll add my voice to the ever-growing pile recommending this film with all our collective heart. **** ½

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Atmospheric Thriller Set In Ecuador
predictable and abrupt...
Worth Hurdling the Language Barrier
Superb Acting....
[3.5]--The Responsibilities of Tabloid Journalism

Cronicas
Starring: Damián Alcázar , Walter Layana , Henry Layana , Tamara Navas , and Washington Garzón
Director: Sebastián Cordero
Manufacturer: Palm Pictures / Umvd
ProductGroup: DVD
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ASIN: B000AYYVII
Release Date: 2005-11-08

Amazon.com

In twisty thriller Crónicas, John Leguizamo (Moulin Rouge) finally lands a lead role worthy of his talent. The Columbian-born actor is Manolo Bonilla, an ambitious Miami-based reporter for a Spanish-language news outlet. When a serial killer devastates a small town in Ecuador, he and his crew, Marisa (Leonor Watling, Talk to Her) and Iván (José María Yazpik, Innocent Voices), fly down to cover the story. Shortly after their arrival, Bonilla saves the life of shifty-looking salesman Vinicio Cepeda (Damián Alcázar). His intentions aren't as honorable as they seem. Cepeda claims to have information regarding the "Monster of Babahoyo" and Bonilla will do anything to keep him talking. Soon his star begins to rise as Cepeda provides him with more and more ratings-grabbing details. Then Bonilla discovers something even the authorities don't know about--another body. His decision to follow the lead on his own could make his career...or completely destroy it. Worse yet, another child may lose his life if Bonilla fails. Featuring Alfred Molina (Frida) as Marisa's TV host husband (seen only via monitor). Written and directed by Sebastián Cordero and produced by Guillermo del Toro and Alfonso Cuarón, Crónicas was nominated for the Grand Jury Prize at the 2005 Sundance Film Festival. --Kathleen C. Fennessy

Description

John Leguizamo stars as Manolo Bonilla, a tabloid TV reporter who traveled from Miami with his news crew on the trail of a story about a serial killer striking a small town in Ecuador. Convinced this story could be the `big one' that makes him a network star, he is willing to bend the rules to get the facts. But the closer he gets to uncovering the truth, the more he finds his carefully planned story spinning dangerously out of control. Soon, Bonilla and his crew find themselves at the center of a frightening situation where even the best intentions can backfire.

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